Help - is it easier to give or receive?

Sometimes, one of the hardest things to do is ask for help.  I've always struggled with this and perhaps there are others who can relate.  This is especially challenging when you are used to taking care of everyone else and being independent.  It is humbling.  What led to this being a necessity in my life lately?  Let me tell you.  It starts with a horse....


My husband and I have enjoyed going horseback riding together for the past 5 years.  Unfortunately,  my faithful and mellow gelding who was 25 years old, died this past winter.  The spring has been spent in search of a new "ride" for me.  Unfortunately, I am not very confident on a horse, even after riding for 5 years.  Quincy (my first "horse love") was calm and not much of a runner which was perfect for me.   Mother's Day weekend, Duane and I took a new horse out to the local county park to go trail riding.  Bad idea.  When the mare started to run, twisting her head back and forth, I couldn't stop her.  I tried the emergency stop I had been shown, but it wasn't working.  I was freaking out and so was the horse which is a dangerous combination.  I ended up getting thrown off, landing on my back and hitting my head.  I am thankful for the riders that came along to help my husband load the horses into the trailer and my body into the truck.  A trip to an ER revealed that nothing was broken according to the X-ray.  Another thing to be thankful for!  But now I needed help.  Help standing up, walking, using crutches, sitting down...everything.  And I was traumatized from the whole experience.


Unless you know me personally, you would be surprised how stubborn I am about NOT wanting to ask for help.  Have I had to help other members of my family when they were injured?  Yes, of course.  But now I was on the other end of things and I didn't like it.  Now that a bit of time has passed, I have been thinking about how difficult it is to accept assistance when we need it.  It doesn't matter what it is.  We can be worn out, stressed out, exhausted from everyday life, a traumatic life event, or what may seem like a never ending circumstance, at the end or our rope.  When these times come, can we reach out and ask for someone to hold us up?   Maybe what is needed is someone to listen without judging or offering advice, but loving us where we are.


In this world, may we reach out to each other in times of need, whether we are the one on the giving end  or the one that needs to receive.  This path was not meant to be walked alone, isolated, hurting.  It is to be lived side by side with love, compassion, and acceptance.